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[ Dream of Takarazuka table of contents ]

Chapter 39 ~*~ Crack

Full of pep once more, I returned to Takarazuka and began rehearsals for the next performance¹.

Top star Takashio Tomoe had announced her retirement, so it was a serious performance.

My injury was now firmly in the past, and although my knee did pain me from time to time, it was Pei-san's last performance so I wasn't going to say anything. Besides, compared to when my injury came to light in the last performance, this was a very easy performance. "Easy peasy!" I thought happily as we got through rehearsals and began the real run.

I thought of how I wanted to spend this precious time and stand on stage with Pei-san during her last performance, searing her image into my mind with my own eyes.

However, it was possible that I would become top star.... When I thought of that the terrifying possibility glimmered in front of my eyes and I didn't know what I would do.

*

I mentioned this before, but it's not like there's a notice: "You're going to be the next top star!"

And, when a top star retires, it's not like they're bound to make the nibante (second-ranked person) automatically into a top star.

So, at that point in time I wasn't sure if I would be top star starting with the next performance or not.

I enjoyed being in the nibante position, and if it were possible I would hold on tightly to it for my entire life.

It might anger the fans, but I wanted to be anything but top star.

The top stars I had looked up to since I was an underclassmen had a sense of responsibility, a determination, a popularity, a real ability, a leadership. The people chosen for that terrible position had it all.

If it came to me, who had none of those things... I would quit Takarazuka.

If things had gone on like that, I wonder if I would have become top star? .... But I didn't want to leave Takarazuka yet.

I understand all too well the saying that "Nothing good comes of humans losing their sense of purpose."

*

After approximately a month, rehearsals ended, and then about ten days into the Grand Theater run the knee that had been giving me no trouble at all-- in the middle of a dance number gave a cracking sound and then I couldn't move it at all.


Chapter 40 ~*~ Tears Dripping

That day I continued the performance trying as best I could to hide the leg I couldn't move that was trailing behind me, and after it ended I rushed to the doctors.

But this time the judo doctors and the acupuncturists couldn't fix my knee.

As tragic as it was, I was master of a knee much more swollen than before, and I was replaced in all my dancing scenes, appearing only in the acting scenes.

Seeing me struggle daily to walk, the upperclassmen and staff of the Revue berated me: "Enough already! Take a break and rest your leg!" And so eventually, I was suspended from the performance.

On the day that my suspension was decided, worried that my replacements might make a mistake or forget, I stood in the wings and watched.

As I watched, tears dripped unstopping down my face.

Among the very worst days of my life, that entered the top five.

Even as I sit here writing this, the sadness I felt that day comes back vividly.

Even though my top half was healthier than anything, even though I could do everything better than my replacements, WHY did my leg have to not be able to move? I wondered miserably.

It caused trouble for everyone around my replacements during this so-important final show of Pei-san's, and for that I felt so incredibly sorry.



(1) Takashio Tomoe's final show was "A Single Rose / The Revuescope"
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[ Dream of Takarazuka table of contents ]

Chapter 38 ~*~ Course of Medical Treatment


After my injury was announced, there was a huge uproar.


At any rate, even if it’s a little blood from a cut, I’m the type to make a big fuss and loudly pester everyone.


Was this the kind of thing to be stoic about? Everyone understood that it was an injury worth sympathizing about.


Those who were bad-mouthing my Cossack dance were suddenly also expressing concern for my knee; countless words of encouragement and thanks.


It even advanced to words of respect: “It’s amazing that she’s dancing with that leg!” Being cared about is a very nice feeling.


The feeling was nice, but my body was in pain.


Among Takarasienne, there are many who carry on with sprains or cracked bones, but that’s not in my nature.


I’m the type who hates pain and can’t tolerate it.


So even if it’s a little cut, I shout “I’m bleeding!” and whine.


* * *


The course of treatment began in order to heal my injured knee.


First of all, I went to a surgery near the theater.


Most Takarasienne, and especially me, tend not to put much trust into a Western surgery. At most, I’d get a compress, something like that, or if I were out on medical leave I’d need to get a medical certificate before I could return, that kind of small thing.


“This is definitely a half-circle rotator cuff tear. It would be best to have a specialist look at it,” they said with a beautifully done, precise diagnosis.


And, of course, a compress wasn’t enough to clear up the pain.


If you can’t take away the pain, you’re no doctor!


With that, I forgot about surgeons and went running to Eastern medicine: a judo therapist and an acupuncturist.


With a double treatment of judo therapy and acupuncture, within about 2-3 days the pain and swelling went away.


Ah, why didn’t I trust in the doctor back then?


Back then if I had let the surgeon examine me thoroughly, I might have avoided later absences from the stage!


It's no use crying over spilled milk. The me who was so joyful over being cured, cured! … was an idiot.


But why did that surgeon only give me a compress?


If he’d done a little more treatment, like stretching my knee, or massaging my knee, done anything, maybe I would have been more inclined to trust him.


* * *


In any case, that time I was able to finish out the run without being absent, and was in all of my scenes except for the Cossack dances.


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[ Dream of Takarazuka table of contents ]


Chapter 37 ~*~ Unexpectedly Crawling on My Belly


When I was a small child I had a delicate constitution, like in those paintings of poor health, but entering Takarazuka forged my body into something tougher and more robust, in a sort of "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger."

However, in the end, this powerful Takarasienne Ōura got into an awkward situation which suspended me from performing.

For ten years I boasted that I never missed a day of rehearsal or performance, but then I got an "injured meniscus"--an occupational disease of athletes and dancers, a knee injury.

The main cause, it seems, was long years of overuse causing my knee to overheat.

Meaning that up until now when the dancer keeps dancing to the point of collapse it seemed cool, but the circumstances of my knee actually giving out were unattractive.

It was in Tokyo, in the middle of a two-show performance of a musical set in Russia and a revue show with tough dancing.¹

We often goofed around, pushing the back of someone's knee with our own knee, causing them to stumble.

And then, suddenly, in the middle of the dance I jerked and stumbled like that all on my own.

I suddenly must have seemed weak in the knees and must have presented a strange sight to those watching and wondering "What is Ōura-san up to?" as I constantly jerked around.

I thought it was strange, but nothing hurt or itched, so I let it be.

(Later I looked it up and this is a typical early warning sign of an injured meniscus, so beware!)

* * *

This strange jerky dancing continued for about a week, then one day I was on stage dancing a Cossack dance.

It was the point where we were doing a typical pattern of a Cossack dance where you are crouched on one foot, the other bending and spinning around it and both arms held still.

There in front of a full house, in the middle of the stage, right under the spotlight, I fell flat onto my face in an ungainly sprawl.

Before I knew what had happened, I was crawling on my belly on stage.

It's not like someone tells you: "Seems like you slipped!" when you generally fall over. Or, if you could predict it, it's not like someone would choose to throw themselves down onto the middle of the stage.

But, there must have been something that caused me to fall to the floor, something I slipped or stumbled over?

But in that moment there wasn't time to figure out what had happened to me, because I was lying on the stage and that state of affairs needed to be fixed.

A mistake on stage or a fall is not something to be embarrassed about.

From where we were crouched on the stage the audience likely wouldn't even have noticed, so it was nothing to be embarrassed about.

Usually I crossed the Silver Bridge after the dance, but instead I was pulled into the wings and beneath my thick stage makeup my face was bright red.

* * *

In the dressing room my stomach felt like water and I bowed to everyone I had been dancing with and apologized and vowed that it wouldn't happen again.

Despite all this, three days later the same thing was still happening.

* * *

Feeling remorseful, I decided this was a result of insufficient practice, and so I attempted to put on my practice clothes and rehearse some more.

I went to crouch and found that my knee wouldn't bend.

A glance at my knee showed that it was as blue and fat as sumo wrestler Konishiki.

Did I eat too much and get fat, I wondered? But as soon as I got that dumb thought out of my head and compared it to my other knee I could see that the outline of the other was plainly clear to see and slim.

I hadn't sprained it. I, who was so proud of never injuring myself, just couldn't comprehend this bloated knee.

"You've got water gathering in your knee," a friend told me, and I started to grasp the situation.

I was injured.

And my knee was so swollen that it wouldn't bend.

And although I had eaten the boards how many times over the past few days, it was someone else who first recognized the injury, even after three days! What an idiot.



(1) "The White Horizon" / "The Beat of Rhapsody" (1987)
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[ Dream of Takarazuka table of contents ]

36 ~*~ Takarasienne

There is valuable data about Takarasienne, that they lose three kilograms of weight and one centimeter of height over the course of a three-hour performance.

I can confirm this as true, as I gave myself a check-up in the morning and at the end of the performance and compared the results.

What I'm trying to say is that our job is hard and physically laborious.

* * *

If I were making a list of how hard it is, I'd start with the costumes.

The motto of Takarazuka theater is gorgeous and beautiful.

The higher an upperclassman you are, the higher the star, the more decorations you wear and the more splendid the costume.

But, it's heavy.

If you're unlucky, there may come a time when you have to wear a costume that's close to ten kilograms.

I'm happy to have a chance to wear pretty costumes, but the heavier they are the hotter they are to wear, and then of course it's really difficult to sing, act, and even dance in them. And I know now that as much as we all say we want to wear the splendid costumes, sometimes we just want to wear the plain, softly spinning costumes.

* * *

Next, the torture of feathers.

"I'm sorry, all you birds!" I can't help but think, with all that weight of feathers on my back.

I was so joyful and so glad the first time I wore the finale costume with gorgeous feathers, like a real star.

But I was shocked by the weight on my back.

I'm not sure how many, a hundred, two hundred or more, that heavy.

And it's not just the weight, but when you walk there's wind resistance, so that it feels like you're walking into a stiff breeze as you walk across the stage.

Just like Dorothy could walk in the twister using the magic of Oz, I guess I've gotten used to walking with the weight of the feathers on my back.

* * *

To continue, I'll explain a bit about quick changes.

You run off into the wing of the stage, change your costume, wipe off your sweat, fix your hair, and run back out onto stage.

When you have one, two minutes to do this, it's a quick change.

My fastest record right now is 25 seconds.

When you have a show with a succession of quick changes, being on stage is a bit of a breather.

And then when a bunch of people are doing a quick change at once, it's rough!

Suddenly you realize that the orchestra is moving on and there's no one on stage.

But that all happens during rehearsals so that when it's the real performance, this is not a sight that the audience sees.

Sometimes one person will come on stage without their hat, or someone is wearing the wrong color shoes, and the quick change location in the wing descends into mayhem.

When someone puts on the wrong costume by mistake, even if the fit isn't quite right that means they have to quickly change and get out on stage.

During a quick change there isn't time to fix a mistaken costume. Quick change, quick change, whoosh, whoosh, and then the show is over! ... is what it feels like. The battle isn't just on the stage. In a Takarazuka show, the stage and the wings are both the battlefield, fifty/fifty.

And the pièce de résistance, the origin of our hard labor, is the singing and dancing.

You might say, "Well, isn't that the job?" And that's true, but if you came out and performed in just half of one of the hour-long revue shows then you would learn the exhaustion for yourself.

It's different from an idol going on TV and dancing along to a dubbed tape of themselves singing.

It's not humming along while doing the housework.

It's singing live along with an orchestra, and dancing.

Singing while dancing, or singing just after you've been dancing is a really hard feat.

Fighting for breath, covered in sweat, and yet continuing to smile; you can't show how much you feel like crying.

* * *

If you can persist through all of this to the end, if you've digested all of this that makes up a performance, well, I'm sorry, but that's the world it is.

In the times before the curtain rises and after it falls, the magazine and newspaper articles, the radio and TV spots, our other appearances, the Bow Hall and tour rehearsals, all of it.... It's doing our job.

I comfort myself that I'm at my best on the job, and want to show myself not resting, but working.

It may seem redundant, but I think that complaining just leads to trouble and more complaints. In half a month I have a Bow Hall, then rehearsals for a Japanese dance performance, then ten days of rehearsals for a dinner show, the ten days after that rehearsals for a dance performance, and various other jobs so that dawn to dusk it continues, and I perform.

I'm busy enough that I wish there were three or four more of me.

And in spite of all of this, here I am heroically putting pen to paper....

I'm at my best on the job. Yes.

* * *

When jobs pile up, you get so busy there's no time to be ill. The powerful Takarasienne will go on, and the show will go on, no matter how the wheel turns, or the rain falls, or the spears fall.

And there isn't a single Takarasienne out there with merely average stamina.
ekusudei: (Default)
Hahaha, so I though: Y'know, it's been a few months since I typed out a chapter of Oura-san's book. ... Try three years. Oops.

[ Dream of Takarazuka table of contents ]

Expand30 ~*~ The Windfall (?) of Nibante )
ekusudei: (Default)
Since it's been so long, a short reminder that Oura is currently in the middle of the South-East Asia Tour in December 1982, and recently had an unpleasant run-in with food poisoning.

[Dream of Takarazuka table of contents ]

Expand28 ~*~ Burma Performance )

And we're back in Japan at last for our next installment, where Oura is finally transferred to Flower Troupe....
ekusudei: (Default)
26 ~*~ Second Foreign Performance

ExpandRead more... )

27 ~*~ The Terrifying Food Poisoning Incident

ExpandRead more... )

[ Dream of Takarazuka table of contents ]
ekusudei: (Sumire Stained-Glass)
There are getting to be enough chapters now that I suppose it's time to start organizing them in an index as well as just the tags. Look at that, half done chapter-wise, more than half done if you count pages! :D

Dream of Takarazuka
by Ōura Mizuki
ISBN4-09-363371-1
(Originally published in the magazine Palette from 1989 through 1991.)


1 ~*~ The Day of Fate
2 ~*~ Father's Opposition
3 ~*~ Ballet
4 ~*~ First Love
5 ~*~ The Incident

6 ~*~ The Entrance Exam
7 ~*~ The Journey
8 ~*~ Entering the School

9 ~*~ My Time as a Yokasei
10 ~*~ Determined Goofing-Off

11 ~*~ First Setback
12 ~*~ Stage Name * Ōura Mizuki
13 ~*~ 'I want to see my mother.'
14 ~*~ I'll Make Singing My Life!
15 ~*~ Parting From Mizushima-Sensei

16 ~*~ My Time in Snow Troupe
17 ~*~ I Woke Up to Drama
18 ~*~ First Foreign Performance
19 ~*~ A Sudden Transfer
20 ~*~ First Star Troupe Performance
21 ~*~ 'Pleasing Oura'
22 ~*~ The Struggle With Osaka-Ben
23 ~*~ The Blooming Topknot
24 ~*~ Bow Hall Lead Roles
25 ~*~ First National Tour
26 ~*~ Second Foreign Tour
27 ~*~ The Terrifying Food Poisoning Incident

28 ~*~ Burma Performance
29 ~*~ Transferring Once Again
30 ~*~ The Windfall (?) of Nibante
31 ~*~ The Incident Where I Fell Off the Silver Bridge
32 ~*~ 'Make-Believe Recitals'
33 ~*~ Pei-san
34 ~*~ 'Bwother!'
35 ~*~ The Fun of Closing Night

36 ~*~ Takarasienne
37 ~*~ Unexpectedly Crawling On My Belly
38 ~*~ Course of Medical Treatment
39 ~*~ Crack
40 ~*~ Tears Dripping

41 ~*~ 'Nooo!'
42 ~*~ Formidable Man
43 ~*~ Days of Rehabilitation
44 ~*~ Inconceivable Leave of Absence
45 ~*~ To London
46 ~*~ Reunited With the Stage
47 ~*~ Being Top.....
48 ~*~ The Curtain Rises
ekusudei: (Default)
When we last left our plucky heroine, she was telling us about Lovers' Suicide. Here she continues with more backstage stories from the show.

Expand23 ~*~ The Blooming Topknot )

Next Up: Chapter 24 ~ Bow Hall Lead
ekusudei: (Star Troupe)
A lot of people had questions about the Takarasienne exams. To be honest, the friend that I got details from did her research and spoke to people in the company prior to the change in exam policy, so I'm not really sure how well my information reflects what is going on today, and it was about seven years ago that she told me, so I probably am not remembering clearly. So I'm keeping it vague in order not to spread misinformation.

Currently, I believe they take the exams at the end of their years as ken-1, ken-3, and ken-5. You can see the fallout from the exam results in April, when the list of troupe members on the official website is changed to reflect the new order of the members (of each class).

I'm not certain what they're tested in, but I would guess dance, song, and acting of certain types, to reflect what they learned in TMS.


Expand21 ~*~ 'Pleasing Oura'  )

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